Selasa, 22 Januari 2008

Starting to get it... although slowly!

And I might also forget again, but there we are.

Today has been bizarre on the food front.

This morning I swallowed my slightly larger SINGLE prozac pill and also a cocktail of paracetamol, phluroglucinol and vitamins and I was full.

Yes, that's right. Full. On pills. Hmm

So i just went with it. Its pay day today so I had all the bills to do and money to sort out and stuff like that, so I was not really that interested in eating really... just getting my stuff done.
So i got my stuff done and it was midday. I grabbed a yoghurt, then I thought I might catch up on a few emails and Cindy turned up. I forget we had a lesson today, but it didn't matter. She is learning a piece of music to play at the talent night and she has never played before in her life! Its really cool teaching her to play this excellent and really hard music when she hasn't got a clue about any of it really. This is the whole point of it because everyone will be stunned when she trots up and plays that! So I did her lesson and said goodbye etc.

Sat watching you tube video's of strange things... I hate you tube as you always get led off somewhere. I started looking up old music and ended up viewing a tour of Dachau Concentration Camp! How does it happen. Anyway, woke up to myself and shuddered thinking about all that horrible stuff that went on and how people still haven't learned to get along together. Man certainly has dominated man to his injury as Jeremiah says.

Then I thought, wow its 2:30. Better get some lunch before I go to work. DS had made himself a chocolate spread sandwich already so I made Noodles for Carina and I. I cooked 3 packets of those little curry flavour tesco value noodles all together. They are only about 8p a packet! So started to tuck into my plate and managed NO JOKE 2 forkfuls. Then I had to stop.

Carina made me tell her about the lap band and how it worked and I drew her a diagram and then realised that actually I wasn't hungry any more. "So it would be stupid for you to eat more" she said. She was right. I think I am finally getting it. Having food on my plate doesn't mean I am hungry still. Its a really hard thing to figure out. I think being blindfolded and fed would be a better way to be honest. I think that seeing a whole plate full of food makes your brain THINK its still hungry so we just carry on. Its nearly an hour since the noodles and I feel full. Hmmm Food for thought.

Can I survive on 2 forkfuls and a muller corner? I am going to have to try because I am off to work now and not home till 9:30!

will update later

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