Bye Bye Carina :o(

Today we said bye bye to our German lodger, Carina. DS was terribly upset. She seemed to be holding it together until I gave her a hug and thanked her for being such a cool lodger. The tears started then, so I quickly said goodbye and hurried her out of the door so that it didn't get all dragged out and horrible. I am really going to miss her. She has already phoned me and told me she is back in Germany and that she is fine. Apparently all her friends and family were there to meet her which is lovely for her.

So today has been a bit horrible. Its sort of been flat and grey and boring. I spent the afternoon and best part of the evening painting. I have painted a couple of doors, a couple of skirting's and some architrave. washed down the walls in the hall and stairs and washed the doors around the handles. I find they get really grubby for some reason. Its only when you start cleaning stuff you realise how minging everything is! So I have a sparkly house that stinks of paint. Great.

I have made the two rooms up for our new Spanish lodgers who arrive on Tuesday evening. I am really excited to meet them. I hope they will like it here and hope that they will be as relaxed with us as Carina was. we will make them as welcome as we possibly can anyway, so hopefully they will fit right in. Maria is taking the yellow bedroom upstairs and Xandra is taking the blue bedroom downstairs. I have made up both their beds and put fresh towels in their rooms and all that kind of thing. I would really like to run a hotel I think. I really enjoy making the room nice for guests.

Food wise, today has been a bit odd. I have felt hungry quite a lot today. I awoke with a bad headache, which I had to dampen with pills... the only ones were ibuprofen. I know I am not allowed to take it but I was desperate! I am sure one tablet won't hurt me. Goodness knows where the paracetamol have gone. We seem to eat packets and packets of them.

Anyway, today I have also pb'd twice.

Breakfast:
I didn't have anything except for juice.

Lunch:
Pasta with pesto and Parmesan on.

Snack:
1/2 Hot bread roll with pesto on

Dinner:
1 sausage, onion gravy, 3 green beans and some strange egg/flour gnocchi type stuff.

I pb'd on the roll, and also on my dinner. Only a little bit. Not serious, but I had to make myself sick on both occasions as my chest was so tight.

I am feeling really shit about food today. I sat looking at my dinner wishing I could just eat it all up really quick.

I did something really weird today too.. When I was eating the roll and I knew I had had enough, I took a massive bite and chewed it and chewed it and then spat it out. Then I took another big bite and did the same again. It felt really nice to have a mouth full of food and to really have a good old chew. Psychologically this is really starting to kick arse. I am obviously craving food, and craving chewing. I have taken to eating gum quite a lot too... another thing I never used to do. I was never a gum chewer. I know its really not a good idea to chew gum with a band in case you swallow it, but I am gonna risk it. I have never EVER swallowed gum yet... Famous last words? I dunno, but come on man its such a remote thing. Also I have a mouthful not some little iddy bitty piece of gum. I like to have about 3 or 4 sticks/bits going round in there at one time to get me really chewing! HA

So I am feeling hard done by and annoyed because I cant eat. Strange that this should coincide with Carina leaving and me being upset. I wonder what I would have eaten had I not had this band? So I just discovered I do comfort eat, and I kind of thought that I didn't too much.

Well I couldn't comfort eat, which is even greater news! Hmmm