musings

New shop open 2 weeks-
* DH given up job to run shop so last expected pay check was on 31th March giving me the willies a little bit about how to pay bills this month, even though initial signs for shop are more than good.
* still have a few bits to do in the shop - shelving and making a cupboard - easy, but on my mind
* have lots of big stock bills at the end of every month until September. This month £1000, next month £2000 june=£3000 july £1000 august £3000 ontop of normal shop running costs and paying ourselves

Slimmingworld-
* class stabbed me all over with many pains when I found out that they think I am a moron anyway for having a band and that it serves me right that I am finding things difficult. Jealousy perhaps? no difference, makes me feel shit and hurt and all because slimmingworld PIG at 1st class told the leader of our 2nd class we joined that I had a band and suddenly everyone in the class knew without me mentioning it AT ALL. very bad form considering slimmingworlds Privacy policy and even though taken up with head office they say their leaders are in the right. This is bollocks as I never told them about it or anyone in that class.
* New class changed names so as not to be recognized from ANY previous class and drive out of my way to get there
* 1st week back put on 1 lb. feel shit
* struggle with no msg and slimmingworld lowfat diet other than eating veg and meat as total source sustainance. end of. That's boring food in my opinion.

Dad-
* fixed up concoction for skin regeneration for him. sourced it, cost £45 in 9 different tablets and batted away "it wont work" comments from him and mum
* concoction working and unbelievable results being seen in just 2 weeks.
* healing means operation for illiostomy reversal will be sooner rather than later = fear of losing father

Dodgy Piston-
* new pills trip off face
* new pills = want to eat LOADS
* pain sorted
* give weird extreme depressive thoughts worse than when had clinical depression. want stop planet and get off

Accounts-
* my end of year accounts need doing
* lost mileage sheets so must use route calculator to calculate route of 5 trips per week for a year. each trip takes approx 4 minutes to process online through a route planner (various stops e.g. start, town 1, town 2, town 3, town 4, town 5, towns 3 again and then home!) total work load envisaged = 12 hours. God.

DH's Accounts-
* headache plain and simple. takes hours working out how to use new account package which should make it easy. DOESNT.
* daily fluff and shiz must be entered and balanced doing head in

DS butt problem-
* worry DS still has trouble with rear end. Dioreah still daily even though taking medicine
* missed hospital appointment by accident on thursday now must wait until 1st June for next one

Sue leaving-
* 2 years after coming here, Sue our lodger is leaving. She got nice bungalow 100 odd miles away and cant turn down - from some ex-navy charity trust offering ex-servicewomen places to live proper cheap. awesome for her. upsetting for us as will miss dearly
* stress finding new lodger - no bites in the 2 weeks since told leaving.

General malaise
* feel dreadful
* feel sleepy and tired
* feel emotionally bankrupt
* want to hide
* want to go away
* want to spend lots of money of pointless shit (but cant cos have none)
* want to eat cakes and pies and takeaway at all times (cant cos lack of said funds)
* *(BLOW MASSIVE RASPBERRY) thats wot its like right now.