I'm still alive!

It was a very busy week. Last weekend we were in Denver for my niece's graduation and got home on Sunday. Driving in to work Monday morning and thinking about all the things I needed to do at work that day it hit me, I had to go to Dallas on Wednesday and return Thursday night. Somehow I had totally forgotten about this trip.

The Dallas trip turned out to be fine. I was a bit apprehensive since I was traveling with a coworker that was fairly new to my team (one year), and I barely knew him other than a few casual conversations. We got to knew each other better and he's a really great guy. I think I've found a new friend on my team. It always amazes me the experiences people have had in life and what interesting lives they've led. John was no exception and has had a very fascinating life (formerly a musician traveling with famous rock bands and now a software developer - I had no idea).

Yesterday was my fine needle aspiration on my thyroid, which is a biopsy to check for cancer. 95% of the time these thyroid nodules are benign. I was prepared with  my eye mask, my noise canceling headphones and my iPod, and I was on Xanax. I won't say I didn't feel a thing, because I did, but it wasn't bad. It was more the idea of needles being stuck in my neck that was sort of causing me anxiety than the actual process.

The doctor told me he wanted to do six needles, but most people stop him at four. Six is the preferred number because each needle only gets one or two cells. After four needles (and I was counting) he lifted my headphones and said we've done four, can we go on and do six? I told him no problem, go for it, I was fine.

The weird thing he was doing is that the needle doesn't just go in and come out, but it goes in then he pumps the needle up and down several times. It didn't really hurt since I had a local anesthetic in my neck, but it didn't feel good either. I lost count but knew he'd done more than two additional needles.

When he was done he told me I was a real trooper and that he'd done twelve needles in my neck and thought he had gotten some really good samples to send to the lab. Again I told him it really wasn't that big of a deal and he said most people wouldn't agree with me. I'll get the results back next week. A phone call if it's serious, by mail if it's not serious.

The sweet nurse told me my neck was thin and long so it was easy for the doctor to get to my thyroid. A lot of people have short, thick necks and the thyroid sits down on the collarbone making it really hard for the needle to get to it. I never thought I had a long neck but apparently it's longer than most. I don't think that's really a compliment, but if it causes less pain for something like this then I'll happily live with my long, skinny neck.

Exercise this week hasn't been the best, with only two good workouts on Monday and Tuesday. I attempted working out in Dallas on Wednesday and Thursday but the hotel fitness center was tiny, the equipment kind of wobbly and rickety, and everything felt sticky from the humidity. Plus I was just totally exhausted. I attempted to work out both days and actually got on the elliptical but only last five minutes each time. It felt like it was going to fall over sideways. Plus it was hot, humid and I was tired.

Considering I was walking and standing up both days in the airport while I worked, I think I burned a few more calories than I would have if sitting at my desk all day.

I tried to eat healthy both days in Dallas, eating salads at T.G.I. Fridays, the only restaurant that had halfway decent food near our gate, having grilled chicken breast and double the broccoli at the hotel restaurant where I happen to know they serve the great Chicken Alfredo.

At the hotel I ate the free breakfast buffet, but skipped the gravy and biscuits with bacon (which my coworker ate), and had two boiled eggs, a banana, and a bowl of raisin bran with non-fat milk. I ate a tiny little 4 ounce non-fat yogurt and read the ingredients later. Corn syrup and 16 grams of sugar! My breakfast was 12 Points. I was somewhat horrified since I usually have a delicious 6 Point breakfast at home, but the damage was already done.

I weighed in this morning at 162.6. Not bad, almost a four pound loss since my last weigh-in of 166.4.

One thing I want to mention is that I don't have this all figured out. A couple posts ago I wrote this is my new normal, eating right and exercising. For the most part that's true.

Yet sometimes I still have moments where I feel really hungry and really want to eat massive amounts of unhealthy food. My guess is that this is similar to what smokers and alcoholics go through after they quit smoking or drinking. I have to fight the urge with all willpower when this happens. It's been weeks since I've had a serious binge (maybe months), but I know it could still happen at any time. I'll have to remain on guard the rest of my life.

I received a postcard from my Weight Watcher leader this week. It said "I'm so proud of you. Do this until you die!". My husband thought it sounded morbid, but I know she speaks the truth. I have to do this until I die. It's just a fact of life, and I'm okay with it.